The Three Bares Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis
Rhyme Scheme: AABBCCDD EEFFGGHI JJKK LLKKH MMN KK OOP NNPPPP QQRR SST| Ma tried to wash her garden slacks but couldn't get 'em clean | A |
| And so she thought she'd soak 'em in a bucket o' benzine | A |
| It worked all right She wrung 'em out then wondered what she'd do | B |
| With all that bucket load of high explosive residue | B |
| She knew that it was dangerous to scatter it around | C |
| For Grandpa liked to throw his lighted matches on the ground | C |
| Somehow she didn't dare to pour it down the kitchen sink | D |
| And what the heck to do with it poor Ma jest couldn't think | D |
| - | |
| Then Nature seemed to give the clue as down the garden lot | E |
| She spied the edifice that graced a solitary spot | E |
| Their Palace of Necessity the family joy and pride | F |
| Enshrined in morning glory vine with graded seats inside | F |
| Jest like that cabin Goldylocks found occupied by three | G |
| But in this case B E A R was spelt B A R E | G |
| A tiny seat for Baby Bare a medium for Ma | H |
| A full sized section sacred to the Bare of Grandpapa | I |
| - | |
| Well Ma was mighty glad to get that worry off her mind | J |
| And hefting up the bucket so combustibly inclined | J |
| She hurried down the garden to that refuge so discreet | K |
| And dumped the liquid menace safely through the centre seat | K |
| - | |
| Next morning old Grandpa arose he made a hearty meal | L |
| And sniffed the air and said 'By Gosh how full of beans I feel | L |
| Darned if I ain't as fresh as paint my joy will be complete | K |
| With jest a quiet session on the usual morning seat | K |
| To smoke me pipe an' meditate an' maybe write a pome | H |
| For that's the time when bits o' rhyme gits jiggin' in me dome ' | - |
| - | |
| He sat down on that special seat slicked shiny by his age | M |
| And looking like Walt Whitman jest a silver whiskered sage | M |
| He filled his corn cob to the brim and tapped it snugly down | N |
| And chuckled 'Of a perfect day I reckon this the crown ' | - |
| He lit the weed it soothed his need it was so soft and sweet | K |
| And then he dropped the lighted match clean through the middle seat | K |
| - | |
| His little grand child Rosyleen cried from the kichen door | O |
| 'Oh Ma come quick there's sompin wrong I heared a dreffel roar | O |
| Oh Ma I see a sheet of flame it's rising high and higher | P |
| Oh Mummy dear I sadly fear our comfort cot's caught fire ' | - |
| - | |
| Poor Ma was thrilled with horror at them words o' Rosyleen | N |
| She thought of Grandpa's matches and that bucket of benzine | N |
| So down the garden geared on high she ran with all her power | P |
| For regular was Grandpa and she knew it was his hour | P |
| Then graspin' gaspin' Rosyleen she peered into the fire | P |
| A roarin' soarin' furnace now perchance old Grandpa's pyre | P |
| - | |
| But as them twain expressed their pain they heard a hearty cheer | Q |
| Behold the old rapscallion squattinn' in the duck pond near | Q |
| His silver whiskers singed away a gosh almighty wreck | R |
| Wi' half a yard o' toilet seat entwined about his neck | R |
| - | |
| He cried 'Say folks oh did ye hear the big blow out I made | S |
| It scared me stiff I hope you uns was not too much afraid | S |
| But now I best be crawlin' out o' this dog gasted wet | T |
| For what I aim to figger out is WHAT THE HECK I ET ' | - |
Robert William Service
(1)
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About The Three Bares
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