An Excellent New Ballad Or, The True English Dean[1] To Be Hanged For A Rape. 1730 Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis
Rhyme Scheme: ABABCC DEDECC FGFGCC HIHICC JKLKCC MNMNCC OPOQCC NDNDCC RSTSCC UVUVCC WSWSCC XNYNCCOur brethren of England who love us so dear | A |
And in all they do for us so kindly do mean | B |
A blessing upon them have sent us this year | A |
For the good of our church a true English dean | B |
A holier priest ne'er was wrapt up in crape | C |
The worst you can say he committed a rape | C |
- | |
In his journey to Dublin he lighted at Chester | D |
And there he grew fond of another man's wife | E |
Burst into her chamber and would have caress'd her | D |
But she valued her honour much more than her life | E |
She bustled and struggled and made her escape | C |
To a room full of guests for fear of a rape | C |
- | |
The dean he pursued to recover his game | F |
And now to attack her again he prepares | G |
But the company stood in defence of the dame | F |
They cudgell'd and cuff'd him and kick'd him down stairs | G |
His deanship was now in a damnable scrape | C |
And this was no time for committing a rape | C |
- | |
To Dublin he comes to the bagnio he goes | H |
And orders the landlord to bring him a whore | I |
No scruple came on him his gown to expose | H |
'Twas what all his life he had practised before | I |
He made himself drunk with the juice of the grape | C |
And got a good clap but committed no rape | C |
- | |
The dean and his landlord a jolly comrade | J |
Resolved for a fortnight to swim in delight | K |
For why they had both been brought up to the trade | L |
Of drinking all day and of whoring all night | K |
His landlord was ready his deanship to ape | C |
In every debauch but committing a rape | C |
- | |
This Protestant zealot this English divine | M |
In church and in state was of principles sound | N |
Was truer than Steele to the Hanover line | M |
And grieved that a Tory should live above ground | N |
Shall a subject so loyal be hang'd by the nape | C |
For no other crime but committing a rape | C |
- | |
By old Popish canons as wise men have penn'd 'em | O |
Each priest had a concubine jure ecclesiae | P |
Who'd be Dean of Fernes without a commendam | O |
And precedents we can produce if it please ye | Q |
Then why should the dean when whores are so cheap | C |
Be put to the peril and toil of a rape | C |
- | |
If fortune should please but to take such a crotchet | N |
To thee I apply great Smedley's successor | D |
To give thee lawn sleeves a mitre and rochet | N |
Whom wouldst thou resemble I leave thee a guesser | D |
But I only behold thee in Atherton's shape | C |
For sodomy hang'd as thou for a rape | C |
- | |
Ah dost thou not envy the brave Colonel Chartres | R |
Condemn'd for thy crime at threescore and ten | S |
To hang him all England would lend him their garters | T |
Yet he lives and is ready to ravish again | S |
Then throttle thyself with an ell of strong tape | C |
For thou hast not a groat to atone for a rape | C |
- | |
The dean he was vex'd that his whores were so willing | U |
He long'd for a girl that would struggle and squall | V |
He ravish'd her fairly and saved a good shilling | U |
But here was to pay the devil and all | V |
His troubles and sorrows now come in a heap | C |
And hang'd he must be for committing a rape | C |
- | |
If maidens are ravish'd it is their own choice | W |
Why are they so wilful to struggle with men | S |
If they would but lie quiet and stifle their voice | W |
No devil nor dean could ravish them then | S |
Nor would there be need of a strong hempen cape | C |
Tied round the dean's neck for committing a rape | C |
- | |
Our church and our state dear England maintains | X |
For which all true Protestant hearts should be glad | N |
She sends us our bishops our judges and deans | Y |
And better would give us if better she had | N |
But lord how the rabble will stare and will gape | C |
When the good English dean is hang'd up for a rape | C |
Jonathan Swift
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