The Diary Of An Old Soul. - April Poem Rhyme Scheme

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George Macdonald

The Diary Of An Old Soul. - April Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis

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	A
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LORD I do choose the higher than my will	B
I would be handled by thy nursing arms	C
After thy will not my infant alarms	C
Hurt me thou wilt but then more loving still	B
If more can be and less in love's perfect zone	D
My fancy shrinks from least of all thy harms	C
But do thy will with me I am thine own	D
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Some things wilt thou not one day turn to dreams	E
Some dreams wilt thou not one day turn to fact	F
The thing that painful more than should be seems	E
Shall not thy sliding years with them retract	F
Shall fair realities not counteract	F
The thing that was well dreamed of bliss and joy	G
Wilt thou not breathe thy life into the toy	G
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I have had dreams of absolute delight	H
Beyond all waking bliss only of grass	I
Flowers wind a peak a limb of marble white	H
They dwell with me like things half come to pass	I
True prophecies when I with thee am right	H
If I pray waking for such a joy of sight	H
Thou with the gold wilt not refuse the brass	I
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I think I shall not ever pray for such	J
Thy bliss will overflood my heart and brain	K
And I want no unripe things back again	L
Love ever fresher lovelier than of old	M
How should it want its more exchanged for much	J
Love will not backward sigh but forward strain	K
On in the tale still telling never told	M
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What has been shall not only be but is	N
The hues of dreamland strange and sweet and tender	O
Are but hint shadows of full many a splendour	O
Which the high Parent love will yet unroll	B
Before his child's obedient humble soul	B
Ah me my God in thee lies every bliss	P
Whose shadow men go hunting wearily amiss	P
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Now ere I sleep I wonder what I shall dream	Q
Some sense of being utter new may come	R
Into my soul while I am blind and dumb	R
With shapes and airs and scents which dark hours teem	Q
Of other sort than those that haunt the day	S
Hinting at precious things ages away	S
In the long tale of us God to himself doth say	S
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Late in a dream an unknown lady I saw	T
Stand on a tomb down she to me stepped thence	U
They tell me quoth I thou art one of the dead	V
And scarce believed for gladness the yea she said	V
A strange auroral bliss an arctic awe	W
A new outworldish joy awoke intense	U
To think I talked with one that verily was dead	V
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Thou dost demand our love holy Lord Christ	X
And batest nothing of thy modesty	Y
Thou know'st no other way to bliss the highest	Z
Than loving thee the loving perfectly	Y
Thou lovest perfectly that is thy bliss	P
We must love like thee or our being miss	P
So to love perfectly love perfect Love love thee	Y
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Here is my heart O Christ thou know'st I love thee	Y
But wretched is the thing I call my love	A2
O Love divine rise up in me and move me	Y
I follow surely when thou first dost move	B2
To love the perfect love is primal mere	O
Necessity and he who holds life dear	O
Must love thee every hope and heart above	A2
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Might I but scatter interfering things	C2
Questions and doubts distrusts and anxious pride	D2
And in thy garment as under gathering wings	C2
Nestle obedient to thy loving side	D2
Easy it were to love thee But when thou	E2
Send'st me to think and labour from thee wide	D2
Love falls to asking many a why and how	E2
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Easier it were but poorer were the love	A2
Lord I would have me love thee from the deeps	C2
Of troubled thought of pain of weariness	C2
Through seething wastes below billows above	A2
My soul should rise in eager hungering leaps	C2
Through thorny thicks through sands unstable press	C2
Out of my dream to him who slumbers not nor sleeps	C2
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I do not fear the greatness of thy command	F2
To keep heart open house to brother men	L
But till in thy God's love perfect I stand	F2
My door not wide enough will open Then	L
Each man will be love awful in my sight	H
And open to the eternal morning's might	H
Each human face will shine my window for thy light	H
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Make me all patience and all diligence	C2
Patience that thou mayst have thy time with me	Y
Diligence that I waste not thy expense	C2
In sending out to bring me home to thee	Y
What though thy work in me transcends my sense	C2
Too fine too high for me to understand	F2
I hope entirely On Lord with thy labour grand	F2
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Lest I be humbled at the last and told	M
That my great labour was but for my peace	C2
That not for love or truth had I been bold	M
But merely for a prisoned heart's release	C2
Careful I humble me now before thy feet	G2
Whate'er I be I cry and will not cease	C2
Let me not perish though favour be not meet	G2
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For what I seek thou knowest I must find	H2
Or miserably die for lack of love	A2
I justify thee what is in thy mind	H2
If it be shame to me all shame above	A2
Thou know'st I choose it know'st I would not shove	A2
The hand away that stripped me for the rod	I2
If so it pleased my Life my love made angry God	I2
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I see a door a multitude near by	J2
In creed and quarrel sure disciples all	B
Gladly they would they say enter the hall	B
But cannot the stone threshold is so high	J2
From unseen hand full many a feeding crumb	R
Slow dropping o'er the threshold high doth come	R
They gather and eat with much disputing hum	R
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Still and anon a loud clear voice doth call	B
Make your feet clean and enter so the hall	B
They hear they stoop they gather each a crumb	R
Oh the deaf people would they were also dumb	R
Hear how they talk and lack of Christ deplore	O
Stamping with muddy feet about the door	O
And will not wipe them clean to walk upon his floor	O
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But see one comes he listens to the voice	C2
Careful he wipes his weary dusty feet	G2
The voice hath spoken to him is left no choice	C2
He hurries to obey that only is meet	G2
Low sinks the threshold levelled with the ground	K2
The man leaps in to liberty he's bound	K2
The rest go talking walking picking round	K2
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If I thus writing rebuke my neighbour dull	B
And talk and write and enter not the door	O
Than all the rest I wrong Christ tenfold more	O
Making his gift of vision void and null	B
Help me this day to be thy humble sheep	L2
Eating thy grass and following thou before	O
From wolfish lies my life O Shepherd keep	L2
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God help me dull of heart to trust in thee	Y
Thou art the father of me not any mood	M2
Can part me from the One the verily Good	N2
When fog and failure o'er my being brood	M2
When life looks but a glimmering marshy clod	M2
No fire out flashing from the living God	M2
Then then to rest in faith were worthy victory	Y
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To trust is gain and growth not mere sown seed	M2
Faith heaves the world round to the heavenly dawn	O2
In whose great light the soul doth spell and read	M2
Itself high born its being derived and drawn	O2
From the eternal self existent fire	O
Then mazed with joy of its own heavenly breed	M2
Exultant humble falls before its awful sire	O
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Art thou not Jesus busy like to us	C2
Thee shall I image as one sitting still	B
Ordering all things in thy potent will	B
Silent and thinking ever to thy father	O
Whose thought through thee flows multitudinous	C2
Or shall I think of thee as journeying rather	O
Ceaseless through space because thou everything dost fill	B
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That all things thou dost fill I well may think	P2
Thy power doth reach me in so many ways	C2
Thou who in one the universe dost bind	M2
Passest through all the channels of my mind	M2
The sun of thought across the farthest brink	P2
Of consciousness thou sendest me thy rays	C2
Nor drawest them in when lost in sleep I sink	P2
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So common are thy paths thy coming seems	C2
Only another phase oft of my me	Y
But nearer is my I O Lord to thee	Y
Than is my I to what itself it deems	C2
How better then couldst thou O master come	R
Than from thy home across into my home	Q2
Straight o'er the marches that I cannot see	Y
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Marches 'Twixt thee and me there's no division	R2
Except the meeting of thy will and mine	S2
The loves that love the wills that will the same	T2
Where thine meets mine is my life's true condition	R2
Yea only there it burns with any flame	T2
Thy will but holds me to my life's fruition	R2
O God I would I have no mine that is not thine	S2
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I look for thee and do not see thee come	R
If I could see thee 'twere a commoner thing	U2
And shallower comfort would thy coming bring	U2
Earth sea and air lie round me moveless dumb	R
Never a tremble an expectant hum	R
To tell the Lord of Hearts is drawing near	O
Lo in the looking eyes the looked for Lord is here	O
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I take a comfort from my very badness	C2
It is for lack of thee that I am bad	M2
How close how infinitely closer yet	M2
Must I come to thee ere I can pay one debt	M2
Which mere humanity has on me set	M2
How close to thee no wonder soul thou art glad	M2
Oneness with him is the eternal gladness	C2
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What can there be so close as making and made	M2
Nought twinned can be so near thou art more nigh	J2
To me my God than is this thinking I	J2
To that I mean when I by me is said	M2
Thou art more near me than is my ready will	B
Near to my love though both one place do fill	B
Yet till we are one Ah me the long until	B
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Then shall my heart behold thee everywhere	O
The vision rises of a speechless thing	U2
A perfectness of bliss beyond compare	O
A time when I nor breathe nor think nor move	B2
But I do breathe and think and feel thy love	A2
The soul of all the songs the saints do sing	U2
And life dies out in bliss to come again in prayer	O
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In the great glow of that great love this death	V2
Would melt away like a fantastic cloud	M2
I should no more shrink from it than from the breath	V2
That makes in the frosty air a nimbus shroud	M2
Thou Love hast conquered death and I aloud	M2
Should triumph over him with thy saintly crowd	M2
That where the Lamb goes ever followeth	V2