Termarter Sorce Poem Rhyme Scheme

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It wasn't kid stakes I 'ad no crook lurk	A
To act deceivin' or to treat 'er mean	B
I'm old enough to know them games don't work	A
Not with Doreen	B
Besides deceit ain't in me bag uv tricks	C
I got a few but there is some that sticks	C
	-
Sticks in me gizzard Some blokes sees no wrong	D
In workin' points an' thinks it bonzer sport	E
To trifle with a wife's belief so long	D
As they ain't cort	E
But when yeh play the game on dead straight lines	F
It 'urts to be accused uv base designs	F
	-
It starts this mornin' I wake with a tooth	G
That's squirmin' like a basketful uv snakes	H
Per'aps I groan a bit to tell the truth	G
An' then she wakes	H
An' arsts me wot I'm makin' faces for	I
I glare at 'er an' nurse me achin' jor	I
	-
That was no very 'appy mornin' song	D
I ain't excusin' my end uv the joke	J
But after that things seem to go all wrong	D
She never spoke	J
One narsty word but while the chops she serves	K
'Er shrieks uv silence fair got on me nerves	K
	-
She might 'ave arst wot ailed me Spare me days I	L
She seen that I was crook She seen me face	M
Swelled like a poisoned pup's She only says	N
'Please to say grace '	-
I mumbles Then in tones that wakes brute force	O
She twitters 'Will yeh take termarter sorce '	-
	-
I could n't eat no breakfast Just the sight	P
Uv sweet things give me tooth a new worse ache	Q
Sez she 'You seem to lost yer apetite	P
'Ave some seed cake '	-
Seed cake Gawstruth I'm there in agerny	B
An' she 'oo swore to love sits mockin' me	R
	-
At last when our small son gits orf to school	S
I goes an' sits down sulkin' on a couch	T
''Ave you a toothache Bill ' sez she quite cool	S
'Or jist plain grouch	T
Yer face looks funny P'raps yer gittin' fat '	-
I glare at 'er an' answer 'Huh ' like that	P
	-
That one word 'Huh ' said in a certain way	U
'Eart felt an' with intention it can well	V
Make the beginnin's uv a perfick day	U
A perfick 'ell	V
So I sez 'Huh an' then done my ole trick	W
A low down lurk uv gittin' orf stage quick	W
	-
It was a slap up day The wattle's gold	P
'Ad jist began to peep among the green	B
An' dafferdils commencin' to unfold	P
They make the scene	B
A pitcher that 'Struth 'Ow that tooth did ache	Q
An' cravin' symperthy I git seed cake	Q
	-
It was a bonzer day The thrush's song	D
Rose like a nymn A touch uv queer remorse	O
Gits me fer 'arf a mo' then goes all wrong	D
Ter marter sorce	O
Women don't understand it's all too plain	B
Termarter sorce she sez an' me in pain	B
	-
I dunno 'ow the mornin' muddled through	I
That naggin' tooth was gittin' reel red 'ot	P
I 'ad a 'arf a dozen things to do	P
An' slummed the lot	P
Then jist before I goes fer mornin' tea	P
I start another row with Wally Free	P
	-
I tells 'im if that fence ain't mended now	B
I'll summons 'im But 'e jist stands an' grins	X
'E's always grinnin' Silly lookin' cow I	L
An' fer two pins	X
I'd go acrost an' give 'is eye a poke	J
'E's far too 'appy fer a single bloke	J
	-
While I am boilin' 'ot Doreen conies out	P
To call me fer me mornin' cup o' tea	P
I turn an' answer with a savage shout	P
'Dear me ' sez she	P
'You seem to be put out this mornin' Bill	V
'E'll mend the fence all right I'm sure 'e will '	-
	-
'Aw It ain't that ' I sez Then I let go	Y
When once we git inside an' ease me mind	P
By tellin' 'er some things she ought to know	Y
I seemed to find	P
A lot uv things that 'elped to make me sore	I
An' they remind me uv a 'ole lot more	I
	-
I tells 'er that no wife 'oo was n't blind	P
Would treat 'er 'usban' like a block uv wood	P
I sez I could n't understand 'er mind	P
Blowed if I could	P
I tells 'er that no woman with a brain	B
An' 'eart would smile to see a man in pain	B
	-
I sez some wives some sorts uv wives uv course	O
If you was lyin' dead no more to wake	Q
Would arst yeh if yeh liked termarter sorse	O
Or else seed cake	Q
I sez I don't look for no fond caress	O
But symperthy an' un'erstandin' Yes	O
	-
I sez sarcastic that I 'ave no doubt	P
Some wives might think termarters an' seed cake	Q
Was 'andy sorts uv things to 'ave about	P
To stop toothache	P
But wot I liked in wives once in a while	V
Was commin sense An' 'ere I seen 'er smile	V
	-
An' then I sez 'Gorbli' me Ain't I worked	P
Me fingers to the bone an' toiled an' slaved	P
Some fellers if their wives 'ad smiled an' sn drked	P
An' so be'aved'	P
She pours the tea an' 'ands acrost my cup	Z
'Would lose their tempers yes an' smash things up '	-
	-
I sez h other things in that same strain	B
I ain't got any fancy to recall	V
That tooth jist 'ad me jumpin' mad with pain	B
But through it all	V
With them fool speeches bubblin' in me throat	P
I saw meself a bleatin' babblin' goat	P
	-
I gulps me tea already 'arf ashamed	P
Uv more than 'arf I'd said But is me wife	A2
All 'umble like a woman 'oo's been blamed	P
Not on yer life	A2
She answers me as if she was me mar	I
'There there ' she sez 'Wot a big kid you are '	-
	-
I gulps more tea an' tells 'er anyway	U
Me toothache ain't a thing to joke about	P
An' I will 'ave to go to town to day	U
An' 'ave it out	P
At that she looks at me with 'er calm eyes	O
Searchin' me through an' through 'fore she replies	O
	-
Then 'Bill ' sez she 'tell me the honest truth	G
Does your tooth ache or is this an excuse	O
Why yesterd'y you 'ad no achin' tooth	G
Aw wot's the use	O
'Excuse Wot for ' I yells But she sez 'Oh	B2
If it's that bad I s'pose you'll 'aye to go '	-
	-
'Excuse ' I sez 'I know wot's in yer mind	P
Yeh think I can't read wonien's thoughts I s'pose	O
Yeh think that I planned this so I could find	P
Wot's 'appened Rose	O
Yeh think I've come the double lied an' schemed	P
About a thing I never even dreamed	P
	-
'Yeh think ' 'There there ' she sez to me again	B
Soothin' an' soft still like a patient mar	I
'It's plain you'll never understand you men	B
Wot women are	I
Their thorts their feelin's 'ow they fear an' doubt	P
Why Bill it's only you I think about '	-
	-
I knoo Somewhere inside me silly nob	C2
I knoo wot thort it is she won't explain	B
She feared if I got with the old crook mob	C2
In Spadgers Lane	B
That I might miss the step I've never queered	P
The pitch in eight long years an' yet she feared	P
	-
'I'll promise you ' I starts But she sez 'Don't	P
Don't promise wot you might regret some day	P
I trust you Bill an' well I know you won't	P
Choose the wrong way	P
Women are silly sometimes Let's ferget	P
All that was said Is that tooth achin' yet '	-
	-
I gives it up It's fairly got me beat	P
The twists an' turin' uv a wonian's mind	P
Nex' thing she's smilin' up at me so sweet	P
So soft an' kind	P
That I with things still in me mind to tell	V
I melts jist like I always do Ah well	V
	-
It was a snodger day The apple trees	O
Was white with bloom All things seemed good to me	P
Except that tooth Then by the fence I sees	O
Poor Wally Free	P
Pretendin' to be happy with 'is plough	B
Poor lonely coot I pity 'im some'ow	Y

Clarence Michael James Stanislaus Dennis

Termarter Sorce Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis

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