Kisses And The Rhythmic Principle Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis
Rhyme Scheme: AABBCCCCDDCCEEFFAAGG CCHHAACCIIGG IIGGCCIIIICCGGG JIJ| My dear ladies that is to say those of you who may happen inadvertently to glance through this dreadful paper | A |
| Most of you no doubt have felt impelled at one time or another to lightly caper | A |
| Round and about a ballroom clasped in the manly and purely platonic embrace of some intellectual affinity some male bird of your type | B |
| There comes a period in the lives of all of us when the time for such festive prancing seems deliciously ripe | B |
| Is it not so Then dance dear ladies dance every time you get a chance | C |
| Pray do not think for a moment that I approve of those incomprehensible persons known as Wowsers | C |
| I object to them on principle I object to all their works opinions and prejudices | C |
| But most of all I object to their absurd hats and totally nondescript trousers | C |
| But I digress Ladies I am your friend | D |
| And ever shall I sympathetically lend | D |
| An ear to your protestations in defence of the polka mazurka and the schottische and the two step and the waltz | C |
| To declare that such dances are indelicate is false | C |
| They are not | E |
| Nor is the turkey trot | E |
| A thing of evil | F |
| And as some would have us believe an invention of the DEVIL | F |
| Nay even the cruelly maligned sticking plaster | A |
| Leadeth in no sense to moral disaster | A |
| For always remember ladies when you are indulging in intricate terpsichorean evolutions then that unutterably ecstatic bliss you | G |
| Experience for the moment is merely an abnormally rapid oxidisation of the mental tissue | G |
| Dear females diners tarts peaches flappers bits o' fluff and perfect ladies | C |
| There are those who will tell you that dancing is a direct importation from Hades | C |
| By making such absurd and obviously idiotic assertions nothing can be gained | H |
| For the whole matter may be scientifically psychologically and biologically explained | H |
| For instance we will suppose that you are treading some stately measure | A |
| Such as the Gaby glide with a partner whose appearance and deportment give you entire pleasure | A |
| And we will suppose | C |
| His is emboldened to propose | C |
| A subsequent and somewhat surreptitious adjournment to the conservatory | I |
| You know the old old story | I |
| And being half inclined to agree you fall to wondering whether mother would really miss you | G |
| Do not hesitate dear lady Respond immediately to the extraordinary and not altogether unpleasant oxidisation of the aforesaid tissue | G |
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| And now dear lady | I |
| Having discovered a secluded nook both cool and shady | I |
| It is just possible that your partner may fondly place his arm around you | G |
| Nay do not let this dumbfound you | G |
| Be not alarmed No haughty glances if you please | C |
| For indications such as these | C |
| Betray a mind uncultured If you would act aright | I |
| I pray you regard the whole matter in a scientific light | I |
| If for a moment I thought you failed to recognise the rhythmic principle I should be sorely grieved | I |
| Remember always remember my dear lady that the poor young man's overcharged brain must at all costs be relieved | I |
| For in the course of my exhaustive researches I have discovered after much Labor and infinite pains | C |
| That a very large proportion of dancing men are afflicted with overcharged brains | C |
| And then should he perchance press you tenderly to his biled shirt and ultimately kiss you | G |
| No protests I pray you | G |
| Reflet again that this is uncontrovertibly another manifestation of the rapid not to say furious oxidisation of the aforementioned tissue | G |
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| And here dear lady endeth my discourse I have nothing to add except perhaps that it would at this point be advisable to return to the ballroom and your maternal relation | J |
| Not of course with any idea of snubbing the poor young man with the overcharged | I |
| brain but merely as an ordinary precaution against the possible effects of over oxidisation | J |
Clarence Michael James Stanislaus Dennis
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