They'll None Of 'em Be Missed Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis
Rhyme Scheme: ABABCCDDBB EBEBFFGGBB HBHBIJIKKBB| As some day it may happen that a victim must be found | A |
| I've got a little list I've got a little list | B |
| Of social offenders who might well be underground | A |
| And who never would be missed who never would be missed | B |
| There's the pestilential nuisances who write for autographs | C |
| All people who have flabby hands and irritating laughs | C |
| All children who are up in dates and floor you with 'em flat | D |
| All persons who in shaking hands shake hands with you like THAT | D |
| And all third persons who on spoiling TETE E TETES insist | B |
| They'd none of 'em be missed they'd none of 'em be missed | B |
| - | |
| There's the nigger serenader and the others of his race | E |
| And the piano organist I've got him on the list | B |
| And the people who eat peppermint and puff it in your face | E |
| They never would be missed they never would be missed | B |
| Then the idiot who praises with enthusiastic tone | F |
| All centuries but this and every country but his own | F |
| And the lady from the provinces who dresses like a guy | G |
| And who doesn't think she waltzes but would rather like to try | G |
| And that FIN DE SIECLE anomaly the scorching motorist | B |
| I don't think he'd be missed I'm SURE he'd not be missed | B |
| - | |
| And that NISI PRIUS nuisance who just now is rather rife | H |
| The Judicial humorist I've got HIM on the list | B |
| All funny fellows comic men and clowns of private life | H |
| They'd none of 'em be missed they'd none of 'em be missed | B |
| And apologetic statesmen of the compromising kind | I |
| Such as What d'ye call him Thing'em Bob and likewise Never | J |
| mind | I |
| And 'St 'st 'st and What's his name and also You know who | K |
| The task of filling up the blanks I'd rather leave to YOU | K |
| But it really doesn't matter whom you put upon the list | B |
| For they'd none of 'em be missed they'd none of 'em be missed | B |
William Schwenck Gilbert
(1)
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