The Humane Mikado Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis

Rhyme Scheme: ABCCDAEAAE FFFFEEEE GHIIHIJIIJKIHHIIIHHI FFFFEEEE IIEEIIILLIIEMMEIIHHI FFFFEEEE

A more humane Mikado neverA
Did in Japan existB
To nobody secondC
I'm certainly reckonedC
A true philanthropistD
It is my very humane endeavourA
To make to some extentE
Each evil liverA
A running riverA
Of harmless merrimentE
-
My object all sublimeF
I shall achieve in timeF
To let the punishment fit the crimeF
The punishment fit the crimeF
And make each prisoner pentE
Unwillingly representE
A source of innocent merrimentE
Of innocent merrimentE
-
All prosy dull society sinnersG
Who chatter and bleat and boreH
Are sent to hear sermonsI
From mystical GermansI
Who preach from ten to fourH
The amateur tenor whose vocal villainiesI
All desire to shirkJ
Shall during off hoursI
Exhibit his powersI
To Madame Tussaud's waxworkJ
The lady who dyes a chemical yellowK
Or stains her grey hair puceI
Or pinches her figgerH
Is blacked like a niggerH
With permanent walnut juiceI
The idiot who in railway carriagesI
Scribbles on window panesI
We only sufferH
To ride on a bufferH
In Parliamentary trainsI
-
My object all sublimeF
I shall achieve in timeF
To let the punishment fit the crimeF
The punishment fit the crimeF
And make each prisoner pentE
Unwillingly representE
A source of innocent merrimentE
Of innocent merrimentE
-
The advertising quack who weariesI
With tales of countless curesI
His teeth I've enactedE
Shall all be extractedE
By terrified amateursI
The music hall singer attends a seriesI
Of masses and fugues and opsI
By Bach interwovenL
With Spohr and BeethovenL
At classical Monday PopsI
The billiard sharp whom any one catchesI
His doom's extremely hardE
He's made to dwellM
In a dungeon cellM
On a spot that's always barredE
And there he plays extravagant matchesI
In fitless finger stallsI
On a cloth untrueH
With a twisted cueH
And elliptical billiard ballsI
-
My object all sublimeF
I shall achieve in timeF
To let the punishment fit the crimeF
The punishment fit the crimeF
And make each prisoner pentE
Unwillingly representE
A source of innocent merrimentE
Of innocent merrimentE

William Schwenck Gilbert



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