To The Stock Exchange Poem Rhyme Scheme

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On its Centenary	A
	-
My dear Stock Exchange	B
I am given to understand	C
That to day you are a hundred years old	D
And that to day therefore	E
You will celebrate	F
What nine men out of every ten of you	G
Call your Centeenary	E
By taking a whole holiday instead of a half one	H
It would be easy for me my dear Stock Exchange	B
To present you	G
With a sort of illuminated address on this occasion	H
But I refrain	I
One short year ago	J
I tumbled into a little money	A
It was not enough to live upon	K
But it was a nice sum	L
A man introduced me to a member of the Stock Exchange	B
The member of the Stock Exchange introduced me to a little game of in and out	M
And my five hundred pounds folded its tents like the Arabs	N
That is to say it silently stole away	O
It was not the member of the Stock Exchange's fault	P
Certainly it was not my fault	P
And I will not say that it was the fault of the Stock Exchange	B
But I am not giving the Stock Exchange	B
Any illuminated addresses	Q
At present	R
On the other hand let me assure you	G
That I believe the Stock Exchange	B
To be a highly respectable	S
Honourable	S
And useful institution	H
It leaves the court without a stain upon its character	E
I say these latter things advisedly	S
Because some time back	T
A friend of mine who writes articles on food supply	S
Having delivered himself of the opinion	H
That London's milk was largely water	E
Was sued for slander	E
By the Amalgamated Society of Dairymen's Daughters	U
And had to climb down and apologise	U
So that on the whole I repeat that in my humble opinion	H
If you want to find	V
Really sound white men	W
Men of spotless character and impregnable probity	S
You cannot do better	E
Than wend your way to Gorgonzola Hall	S
And joking apart my dear Stock Exchange	B
You really are a blessing	X
If it were not for you	G
People with a lot of money	S
And people with only a little	S
Would simply not lose it	Y
It would lie in banks and old stockings and kindred receptacles	U
Till it went mouldy	S
You keep things going	X
You are the heart of the monetary world	Z
You pump in the gold	D
You pump out all that you don't happen to want	A2
And you go and live in Maida Vale	S
Keep a butler	E
Drive two horses	U
And change your name from Manassah to Howard	B2
This Centeenary holiday of yours	U
Gives me much pause	U
Supposing instead of taking a day	O
You were to take a year	E
What would happen to England	C2
SHE WOULD BE RUINED	C2
Yeth indeed	D2

Thomas William Hodgson Crosland

To The Stock Exchange Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis

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