To The "muddied Oaf" Poem Rhyme Scheme

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My dear Muddied Oaf	A
While still a youth and all unknown to fame	B
I went to school	C
And on a certain Saturday	D
I put on a beautiful blue jersey and some striped knickers	E
And betook myself into a damp field	F
With my hands nice and clean	G
And my hair parted	H
Within an hour's time	I
My shins had the appearance of a broken paint can	J
My garments were covered with mud	H
One of my teeth had somehow got swallowed	K
And my hair was out of joint	L
When I come to think of it	M
In that hour I must have been a Muddied Oaf	A
Though I did not know what to call myself	A
And no doubt on that and successive Saturday afternoons	N
I won my various journalistic Waterloos	N
And contracted a stubborn cardiac hypertrophy	A
Which is even yet with me	A
For nigh twenty years however	O
I have never to my knowledge	P
Taken part in a football match	Q
And in spite of Mr Kipling	R
I do not propose to indulge again	S
In either Rugby or the other thing	R
Youth loves to be muddied	T
In old age one flings one's mud at other people	U
I don't know my dear Muddied Oaf	A
How you like being called a Muddied Oaf	A
The average Muddied Oaf of my acquaintance	N
Will not in the least understand	V
What Muddied Oaf means	N
And even when a dozen reporters	N
Have explained it to him dictionary in hand	V
He will not care	W
You cannot take the glory of having crumpled up the Footleum Otspurs out of a man	J
By calling him Muddy	A
And as for Oaf	A
When all is said	X
It is a poor synonym for dashing forward	Y
No my dear boy	Z
Phrases out of poems cannot damp your ardours	N
And so far as you are concerned	A2
Mr	O
Rudyard	Y
Kipling	R
May	B2
Be	A
Blowed	K
All the same I assure you	C2
As an old muddifier	O
That there is a great deal in what the gentleman says	N
To a delicate age	D2
Rifle practice presents many attractions	N
To shoot out of a No rifle	U
At a choice array of clay pipes dancing globules and cardboard rabbits	N
Is on the face of it	M
A gentleman's job	E2
You can do it with your hair parted	H
And providing you don't get betting drinks	N
That you will ring the bell every time	I
It doesn't cost much	F2
Regular practice	N
At the ordinary shooting booths	N
Will no doubt make a soldier and a gentleman of you	C2
And teach you to fear no Boer in shining armour	O
These are points worth considering	R
Also the game does not hurt	G2
You need no lemon to help you through with it	M
You run no risk of dislocation fracture hypertrophy gouged eye or broken neck	H2
You are on velvet all the time	I
And when it comes to calling names	N
You will have the honour and glory	O
Of being set down for a gallant and gilt edged	I2
Defender of your country	O
Ponder it O Muddied One	J2
And be wise	N

Thomas William Hodgson Crosland

To The "muddied Oaf" Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis

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