To The Motorist Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis

Rhyme Scheme: ABCCDEFCGACHIJKLMNAG COPQMCCCRSTUBVWGCBXC YGCCCZKAGKA2LTTCAMB2 C2TD2E2AT

My dear SirA
When men have nightmares they dream about youB
I myself have been chased over the tops of pinnaclesC
By flaming eyed Panhards and DurkoppsC
In my sleepD
Nor is this allE
For if one brings oneselfF
To read reports of the proceedings of police courtsC
One finds that the average citizenG
Gets more or less chased by you sirA
In his waking momentsC
The Police I know sir seldom speak the truthH
They remember so well the dayI
When a horseless carriage had to be taken through the streetJ
At the speed of a funeral marchK
And with a red flag in front of itL
That the spectacle of an affable motoristM
Bowling through a Surrey villageN
To the tune of six miles an hourA
Shocks ther imaginationG
And they believe for the rest of their natural livesC
That the affable motorist aforesaidO
Must have been travellingP
At the rate of anything from to miles per minuteQ
Hence my dear motoristM
It comes to pass that you are afforded so many opportunitiesC
For airing your eloquence and the fatness of your purseC
Before the police magistratesC
In my opinion it seems just possibleR
That the real trouble lies in the factS
That you my dear sir do actuallyT
Go through villages at a very low speedU
And that really the best thing you can doB
Would be to make a point of going through themV
At the highest speed consistentW
With the safety of your own personG
For if you did thisC
No policeman of my acquaintance would be able to catch youB
Hence you would never be finedX
I have been out of sympathy with motor carsC
Right up to the other nightY
The other night I had the felicity to take a small trip on oneG
The motorist would fain have driven me to my houseC
Which is half an hour's cab drive from Charing CrossC
He offered to do the distance in ten minutesC
And started stirring up his petroleumZ
But I said No Let us go to the Marble ArchK
We went through the Mall to Hyde Park CornerA
to South Kensington to PaddingtonG
Into the Edgware Road and so to the Marble ArchK
Time at the outside minA2
I am willing to admitL
That we went down certain streets quite rapidlyT
What time the policemen at odd corners stared stupidlyT
And fumbled for their note booksC
But as a result of that trip my dear sirA
I have become an enthusiastic motoristM
I am convinced that speed and wind and the smell of petroleum mixedB2
Is the only thing which can be considered worth living forC2
And if you happen to know anybodyT
Who would be willing to takeD2
A typewriter and a pair of skates not much wornE2
In exchange for a Durkopp racerA
Kindly communicate with meT

Thomas William Hodgson Crosland



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