Ode To W. Kitchener, M.d. Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis

Rhyme Scheme: ABCD E FGGHFIHIEEIGGI JIBBIIKL MNMNOOJ IEEIIPQ P RRISISTTUUVVHWWXXIIB YYB A ZA2A2ZZB2C2 A2A2B2ID2ID2E2JE2JF2 F2 J A2YA2YG2G2YYH2IIH2G2 G2H2AMMAYYYYIIY A G2G2AII AA2A2II2I2IG2G2A2A2 A YAYYAYYIIYYA2IEJ2IIE J2J2 A AYAG2G2YYHA2A2HYHHYY G2A2G2IIA2A2 I A2YYA2IA2IK2J2J2K2IA AI

Author ofA
The Cook's Oracle Observations on Vocal Music The Art of Invigorating and Prolonging Life Practical Observations on Telescopes Opera Glasses and Spectacles The Housekeeper's LedgerB
andC
The Pleasure of Making a WillD
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'I rule the roast as Milton says '-
Caleb QuotemE
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Oh multifarious manF
Thou Wondrous Admirable Kitchen CrichtonG
Born to enlightenG
The laws of Optics Peptics Music CookingH
Master of the Piano and the PanF
As busy with the kitchen as the skiesI
Now lookingH
At some rich stew thro' Galileo's eyesI
Or boiling eggs timed to a metronomeE
As much at homeE
In spectacles as in mere isinglassI
In the art of frying brown as a digressionG
On music and poetical expressionG
Whereas how few of all our cooks alasI
Could tell Calliope from 'Callipee '-
How few there beJ
Could leave the lowest for the highest stories ObservatoriesI
And turn like thee Diana's calculatorB
However cook's synonymous with KaterB
Alas still let me sayI
How few could layI
The carving knife beside the tuning forkK
Like the proverbial Jack ready for any workL
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II-
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Oh to behold thy features in thy bookM
Thy proper head and shoulders in a plateN
How it would lookM
With one rais'd eye watching the dial's dateN
And one upon the roast gently cast downO
Thy chops done nicely brownO
The garnish'd brow with 'a few leaves of bay'J
The hair 'done Wiggy's way '-
And still one studious finger near thy brainsI
As if thou wert just comeE
From editing someE
New soup or hashing Dibdin's cold remainsI
Or Orpheus like fresh from thy dying strainsI
Of music Epping luxuries of soundP
As Milton says 'in many a boutQ
Of linked sweetness long drawn out '-
Whilst all thy tame stuff'd leopards listen'd roundP
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III-
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Oh rather thy whole proper length revealR
Standing like Fortune on the jack thy wheelR
Thou art like Fortune full of chops and changesI
Thou hast a fillet too before thine eyeS
Scanning our kitchen and our vocal rangesI
As tho' it were the same to sing or fryS
Nay so it is hear how Miss Paton's throatT
Makes 'fritters' of a noteT
And how Tom Cook Fryer and Singer bornU
By name and nature oh how night and mornU
He for the nicest public taste doth dish upV
The good things from that Pan of music BishopV
And is not reading near akin to feedingH
Or why should Oxford Sausages be fitW
Receptacles for witW
Or why should Cambridge put its little smartX
Minc'd brains into a TartX
Nay then thou wert but wise to frame receiptsI
Book treatsI
Equally to instruct the Cook and cram herB
Receipts to be devour'd as well as readY
The Culinary Art in gingerbreadY
The Kitchen's Eaten GrammarB
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IVA
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Oh very pleasant is thy motley pageZ
Aye very pleasant in its chatty veinA2
So in a kitchen would have talk'd MontaigneA2
That merry Gascon humorist and sageZ
Let slender minds with single themes engageZ
Like Mr Bowles with his eternal PopeB2
Or Haydon on perpetual Haydon orC2
Hume on 'Twice three make four '-
Or Lovelass upon Wills Thou goest onA2
Plaiting ten topics like Tate WilkinsonA2
Thy brain is like a rich KaleidoscopeB2
Stuff'd with a brilliant medley of odd bitsI
And ever shifting on from change to changeD2
Saucepans old Songs Pills Spectacles and SpitsI
Thy range is wider than a Rumford RangeD2
Thy grasp a miracle till I recallE2
Th' indubitable cause of thy varietyJ
Thou art of course th' Epitome of allE2
That spying frying singing mix'd SocietyJ
Of Scientific Friends who used to meetF2
Welch Rabbits and thyself in Warren StreetF2
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VJ
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Oh hast thou still those ConversazioniA2
Where learned visitors discoursed and fedY
There came BelzoniA2
Fresh from the ashes of Egyptian deadY
And gentle Poki and that Royal PairG2
Of whom thou didst declareG2
'Thanks to the greatest Cooke we ever readY
They were what Sandwiches should be half bred'Y
There fam'd M'Adam from his manual toilH2
Relax'd and freely own'd he took thy hintsI
On 'making Broth with Flints'I
There Parry came and show'd thee polar oilH2
For melted butter Combe with his medullaryG2
Notions about the SkulleryG2
And Mr Poole too partial to a broilH2
There witty Rogers came that punning elfA
Who used to swear thy bookM
Would really lookM
A Delphic 'Oracle ' if laid on DelfA
There once a month came Campbell and discuss'dY
His own and thy own 'Magazine of Taste'Y
There Wilberforce the JustY
Came in his old black suit till once he trac'dY
Thy sly advice to Poachers of Black FolksI
That 'do not break their yolks'I
Which huff'd him home in grave disgust and hasteY
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VIA
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There came John Clare the poet nor forboreG2
Thy Patties thou wert hand and glove with MooreG2
Who call'd thee 'Kitchen Addison' for whyA
Thou givest rules for Health and Peptic PillsI
Forms for made dishes and receipts for WillsI
'Teaching us how to live and how to die '-
There came thy Cousin Cook good Mrs FryA
There Trench the Thames Projector first brought onA2
His sine Quay nonA2
There Martin would drop in on Monday evesI
Or Fridays from the pens and raise his breathI2
'Gainst cattle days and deathI2
Answer'd by Mellish feeder of fat beevesI
Who swore that Frenchmen never could be eagerG2
For fighting on soup meagreG2
'And yet as thou would'st add the French have seenA2
A Marshall Tureen'A2
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VIIA
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Great was thy Evening Cluster often grac'dY
With Dollond Burgess and Sir Humphry DavyA
'Twas there M'Dermot first inclin'd to TasteY
There Colborn learn'd the art of making pasteY
For puffs and Accum analyzed a gravyA
Colman the Cutter of Coleman Street 'tis saidY
Came there and Parkins with his Ex wise headY
His claim to letters Kater too the Moon'sI
Crony and Graham lofty on balloonsI
There Croly stalk'd with holy humor heatedY
Who wrote a light horse play which Yates completedY
And Lady Morgan that grinding organA2
And Brasbridge telling anecdotes of spoonsI
Madame Valbr que thrice honor'd thee and cameE
With great Rossini his own bow and fiddleJ2
The Dibdins Tom Charles Frognall came with tunsI
Of poor old books old punsI
And even Irving spar'd a night from fameE
And talk'd till thou didst stop him in the middleJ2
To serve round Tewah diddleJ2
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VIIIA
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Then all the guests rose up and sighed good byeA
So let them thou thyself art still a HostY
Dibdin Cornaro Newton Mrs FryA
Mrs Glasse Mr Spec Lovelass and WeberG2
Matthews in Quot'em Moore's fire worshipping GheberG2
Thrice worthy Worthy seem by thee engross'dY
Howbeit the Peptic Cook still rules the roastY
Potent to hush all ventriloquial snarlingH
And ease the bosom pangs of indigestionA2
Thou art sans questionA2
The Corporation's love its Doctor DarlingH
Look at the Civic Palate nay the BedY
Which set dear Mrs Opie on supplyingH
Illustrations of LyingH
Ninety square feet of down from heel to headY
It measured and I dreadY
Was haunted by a terrible night MareG2
A monstrous burthen on the corporationA2
Look at the Bill of Fare for one day's shareG2
Sea turtles by the score Oxen by drovesI
Geese turkeys by the flock fishes and loavesI
Countless as when the Lilliputian nationA2
Was making up the huge man mountain's rationA2
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IXI
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Oh worthy Doctor surely thou hast drivenA2
The squatting Demon from great Garratt's breastY
His honor seems to restY
And what is thy reward Hath London givenA2
Thee public thanks for thy important serviceI
Alas not evenA2
The tokens it bestowed on Howe and JervisI
Yet could I speak as Orators should speakK2
Before the worshipful the Common CouncilJ2
Utter my bold bad grammar and pronounce illJ2
Thou should'st not miss thy Freedom for a weekK2
Richly engross'd on vellum Reason urgesI
That he who rules our cookery that heA
Who edits soups and gravies ought to beA
A Citizen where sauce can make a BurgessI

Thomas Hood



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