Ode To Sir Andrew Agnew, Bart.[1] Poem Rhyme Scheme

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At certain seasons he makes a prodigious clattering with his bill SELBY	A
	-
The bill is rather long flat and tinged with green BEWICK	B
	-
	-
O Andrew Fairservice but I beg pardon	C
You never labor'd in Di Vernon's garden	C
On curly kale and cabbages intent	D
Andrew Churchservice was the thing I meant	D
You are a Christian I would be the same	E
Although we differ and I'll tell you why	F
Not meaning to make game	E
I do not like my Church so very High	F
	-
When people talk as talk they will	G
About your bill	G
They say among their other jibes and small jeers	H
That if you had your way	I
You'd make the seventh day	I
As overbearing as the Dey of Algiers	J
Talk of converting Blacks	K
By your attacks	K
You make a thing so horrible of one day	I
Each nigger they will bet a something tidy	A
Would rather be a heathenish Man Friday	A
Than your Man Sunday	I
	-
So poor men speak	B
Who once a week	B
P'rhaps after weaving artificial flowers	L
Can snatch a glance of Nature's kinder bowers	L
And revel in a bloom	M
That is not of the loom	M
Making the earth the streams the skies the trees	N
A Chapel of Ease	N
Whereas as you would plan it	O
Wall'd in with hard Scotch granite	P
People all day should look to their behaviors	L
But though there be as Shakspeare owns	Q
Sermons in stones	Q
Zounds Would you have us work at them like paviors	Q
	-
Spontaneous is pure devotion's fire	R
And in a green wood many a soul has built	S
A new Church with a fir tree for its spire	T
Where Sin has prayed for peace and wept for guilt	S
Better than if an architect the plan drew	U
We know of old how medicines were back'd	V
But true Religion needs not to be quack'd	V
By an Un merry Andrew	U
	-
Suppose a poor town weary sallow elf	W
At Primrose hill would renovate himself	W
Or drink and no great harm	X
Milk genuine at Chalk Farm	X
The innocent intention who would balk	B
And drive him back into St Bennet Fink	B
For my part for my life I cannot think	B
A walk on Sunday is the Devil's Walk	B
	-
But there's a sect of Deists and their creed	V
Is D ing other people to be d d	V
Yeas all that are not of their saintly level	Y
They make a pious point	V
To send with an aroint	V
Down to that great Fillhellenist the Devil	Y
To such a ramble by the River Lea	V
Is really treading on the Banks of D	V
	-
Go down to Margate wisest of law makers	Q
And say unto the sea as Canute did	V
Of course the sea will do as it is bid	V
This is the Sabbath but there be no Breakers	Q
Seek London's Bishop on some Sunday morn	Z
And try him with your tenets to inoculate	V
Abuse his fine souchong and say in scorn	Z
This is not Churchman's Chocolate	V
	-
Or seek Dissenters at their mid day meal	A2
And read them from your Sabbath Bill some passages	Q
And while they eat their mutton beef and veal	A2
Shout out with holy zeal	A2
These are not Chappet's sassages	Q
Suppose your Act should act up to your will	G
Yet how will it appear to Mrs Grundy	V
To hear you saying of this pious bill	G
It works well on a Sunday	V
	-
To knock down apple stalls is now too late	V
Except to starve some poor old harmless madam	B2
You might have done some good and chang'd our fate	V
Could you have upset that which ruined Adam	B2
'Tis useless to prescribe salt cod and eggs	Q
Or lay post horses under legal fetters	Q
While Tattersall's on Sunday stirs its Legs	Q
Folks look for good examples from their Betters	Q
	-
Consider Acts of Parliament may bind	V
A man to go where Irvings are discoursing	B
But as for forcing proper frames of mind	V
Minds are not framed like melons for such forcing	B
	-
Remember as a Scottish legislator	R
The Scotch Kirk always has a Moderator	R
Meaning one need not ever be sojourning	B
In a long Sermon Lane without a turning	B
Such grave old maids as Portia and Zenobia	C2
May like discourses with a skein of threads	Q
And love a lecture for its many heads	Q
But as for me I have the Hydra phobia	C2
	-
Religion one should never overdo	V
Right know I am no minister you be	V
For you would say your service sir to me	V
Till I should say My service sir to you	V
Six days made all that is you know and then	D2
Came that of rest by holy ordination	C
As if to hint unto the sons of men	D2
After creation should come re creation	C
Read right this text and do not further search	E2
To make a Sunday Workhouse of the Church	E2

Thomas Hood

Ode To Sir Andrew Agnew, Bart.[1] Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis

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