The Progress Of A Divine: Satire Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis

Rhyme Scheme: AABBCC DDEFGH IIJJKKLLMMNNII LLLLII LLOPLLQQRRQQSSRRLL NNTTUULLVWXY CCZZFEA2A2RRB2B2JJTT LLC2C2B2B2LLD2D2 LLE2E2 CCLLII LLB2B2 F2F2LLG2G2LLH2H2I2I2 J2J2K2L2I2I2 LLPP KM2CCPPN2N2O2O2PPP2P 2 LLPPQ2Q2LLLLQ2Q2R2R2 S2S2 RRPPT2T2U2U2V2V2B2B2 V2V2W2W2LLMMX2X2Y2I

All priests are not the same be understoodA
Priests are like other folks some bad some goodA
What's vice or virtue sure admits no doubtB
Then clergy with church mission or withoutB
When good or bad annex we to your nameC
The greater honour or the greater shameC
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Mark how a country Curate once could riseD
Tho' neither learn'd nor witty good nor wiseD
Of innkeeper or butcher if begotE
At Cam or Isis bred imports it notF
A Servitor he was Of hall or collegeG
Ask not to neither credit is his knowledgeH
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Four years thro' foggy ale yet made him seeI
Just his neck verse to read and take degreeI
A gown with added sleeves he now may wearJ
While his round cap transforms into a squareJ
Him quite unsconc'd the butt'ry book shall ownK
At pray'rs tho' ne'er devout so constant knownK
Let testimonials then his worth discloseL
He gains a cassock beaver and a roseL
A Curate now his furniture reviewM
A few old sermons and a bottle screwM
A Curate Where His name cries one reciteN
Or tell me this Is pudding his delightN
Why our's loves pudding Does he so 'tis heI
A Servitor Sure Curl will find a keyI
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His Alma Mater now he quite forsakesL
She gave him one degree and two he takesL
He now the hood and sleeve of Master wearsL
Doctor quoth they and lo a scarf he bearsL
A swelling russling glossy scarf yet heI
By peer unqualify'd as by degreeI
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This Curate learns church dues and law to teaseL
When time shall serve for tithes and surplice feesL
When 'scapes some portion'd girl from guardian's pow'rO
He the snug licence gets for nuptual hourP
And rend'ring vain her parent's prudent caresL
To sharper weds her and with sharper sharesL
Let babes of poverty convulsive lieQ
No bottle waits tho' babes unsprinkled dieQ
Half office serves the fun'ral if it bringR
No hope of scarf or hatband gloves or ringR
Does any wealthy fair desponding lieQ
With scrup'lous conscience tho' she knows not whyQ
Would cordial counsel make the patient wellS
Our priest shall raise the vapours not dispelS
His cant some orphan's piteous case shall bringR
He bids her give the widow's heart to singR
He pleads for age in want and while she lingersL
Thus snares her charity with bird lime fingersL
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Now in the patron's mansion see the wightN
Factious for pow'r a son of Levy rightN
Servile to 'squires to vassals proud his mienT
As Codex to inferior Clergy seenT
He flatters till you blush but when withdrawnU
'Tis his to slander as 'twas his to fawnU
He pumps for secrets pries o'er servants' waysL
And like a meddling priest can mischief raiseL
And from such mischief thus can plead desertV
'Tis all my patron's int'rest at my heartW
Deep in his mind all wrongs from others liveX
None more need pardon and none less forgiveY
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At what does next his erudition aimC
To kill the footed and the feather'd gameC
Then this Apostle for a daintier dishZ
With line or net shall plot the fate of fishZ
In kitchen what the cookmaid calls a cotF
In cellar with the butler brother sotE
Here too he corks in brewhouse hops the beerA2
Bright in the hall his parts at whist appearA2
Dext'rous to pack yet at all cheats exclaimingR
The priest has av'rice av'rice itch of gamingR
And gaming fraud But fair he strikes the ballB2
And at the plain of billiard pockets allB2
At tables now But oh if gammon'd thereJ
The startling echoes learn like him to swearJ
Tho' ne'er at authors in the study seenT
At bowls sagacious master of the greenT
A connoisseur as cunning as a foxL
To bet on racers or on battling cocksL
To preach o'er beer in boroughs to procureC2
Voters to make the 'squire's election sureC2
For this where clowns stare gape and grin and baulB2
Free to buffoon his function to 'em allB2
When the clod justice some horse laugh wou'd raiseL
Foremost the dullest of dull jokes to praiseL
To say or unsay at his patron's nodD2
To do the will of all save that of GodD2
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His int'rest the most servile part he deemsL
Yet much he sways where much to serve he seemsL
He sways his patron rules the Lady mostE2
And as he rules the Lady rules the roastE2
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Old tradesmen must give way to new his aimC
Extorted poundage once the steward's claimC
Tenants are rais'd or as his pow'r increasesL
Unless they fine to him renew no leasesL
Thus tradesmen servants tenants none are freeI
Their loss and murmur are his gain and gleeI
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Lux'ry he loves but like a priest of senseL
Ev'n lux'ry loves not at his own expenceL
Tho' harlot passions wanton with his willB2
Yet av'rice is his wedded passion stillB2
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See him with napkin o'er his band tuck'd inF2
While the rich grease hangs glist'ning on his chinF2
Or as the dew from Aaron's beard declinesL
Ev'n to his garment hem soft trickling shinesL
He feeds and feeds swills soop and sucks up marrowG2
Swills sucks and feeds till leach'rous as a sparrowG2
Thy pleasure Onan now no more delightsL
The lone amusement of his chaster nightsL
He boasts let Ladies put him to the testH2
Strong back broad shoulders and a well built chestH2
With stiff'ning nerves now steals he sly awayI2
Alert warm chuckling ripe for am'rous playI2
Ripe to caress the lass he once thought meetJ2
At church to chide when penanc'd in a sheetJ2
He pants the titillating joy to proveK2
The fierce short sallies of luxurious loveL2
Not fair Cadiere and Confessor than theyI2
In straining transports more lascivious layI2
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Conceives her womb while each so melts and thrillsL
He plies her now with love and now with pillsL
No more falls penance cloath'd in shame upon herP
These kill her embryo and preserve her honourP
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Riches love pow'r his passions then we ownK
Can he court pow'r and pant not for renownM2
Fool wise good wicked all desire a nameC
Than him young heroes burn not more for fameC
While about ways of heav'n the schoolmen jarP
The church re echoing to the wordy warP
The ways of earth he on his horse astrideN2
Can with big words contest with blows decideN2
He dares some carrier charg'd with cumb'rous loadO2
Disputes dismounts and boxes for the roadO2
Ye hooting boys Oh Well play'd parson cryP
Oh Well play'd parson hooting vales replyP
Winds waft it to Cathedral Domes aroundP2
Cathedral Domes from inmost choirs resoundP2
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The man has many meritorious waysL
He'll smoak his pipe and London's prelate praiseL
His public pray'rs his oaths for George declareP
Yet mental reservation may forswearP
For safe with friends he now in loyal stealthQ2
Hiccups and stagg'ring cries King Jemmy's healthQ2
God's word he preaches now and now profanesL
Now swallows camels and at gnats now strainsL
He pities men who in unrighteous daysL
Read or what's worse write poetry and playsL
He readeth not what any author saithQ2
The more his merit in implicit faithQ2
Those who a jot from mother church recedeR2
He damns like any Athanasian creedR2
He rails at Hoadley so can zeal possess himS2
He's orthodox as Gibson's self God bless himS2
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Satan whom yet for once he pays thanksgivingR
Sweeps off th' incumbent now of fat goose livingR
He seeks his patron's Lady finds the fairP
And for her int'rest first prefers his prayerP
You pose me not said she tho' hard the taskT2
Tho' husbands seldom give what wives will askT2
My dearee does not yet to think inclineU2
How oft your nest you feather priest from mineU2
This pin money tho' short has not betray'dV2
Nor jewels pawn'd nor tradesmen's bills unpay'dV2
Mine is the female fashionable skillB2
To win my wants by cheating at quadrilleB2
You bid me with prim look the world deludeV2
Nor sins my priest demurer than his prudeV2
Least thinks my Lord you plant the secret hornW2
That yours his hopeful heir so newly bornW2
'Tis mine to tease him first with jealous fearsL
And thunder all my virtue in his earsL
My virtue rules unquestion'd Where's the cueM
For that which governs him to govern youM
I gave you pow'r the family complainX2
I gave you love but all your love is gainX2
My int'rest wealth for these alone you burnY2
With these you leave meI

Richard Savage



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