Repaired Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis

Rhyme Scheme: ABAABB CDCCDD EFEEFF GHGGII JFJJFF IIIIII IIIIII KLKKML CFCCNN

Hauled I was from out the tipA
Fritz made with his demonstrationB
All broke up a fractured hipA
In me Darby Kell a ripA
Settn' up a cool sensationB
Like excessive ventilationB
-
One 'and cluttered up a treatC
On me oath you wouldn't know itD
From a 'andsome plate of meatC
They had sorter pied me feetC
And a bullet of the foe hitD
Where no decent bloke could show itD
-
'Arf a year they've botched me nowE
Ev'ry scientific schemerF
In the cor' has faked me prowE
Soled 'n' heeled a bloke somehowE
Gawd the last one was a screamerF
Wirin' up me flamin' femurF
-
Comes a guy and pipes you squareG
Gogglin' at you through his glassesH
Swings you in the barber's chairG
Tilts you this end up with careG
Lets you have a whiff of gassesI
Chattin' off hand with the lassesI
-
Then he slices clean 'n' swiftJ
Like a cobbler cuts his leatherF
Gives the splintered knob a liftJ
S'elp me tater it's a giftJ
How they glues you all togetherF
Sayin' it's bin nicer weatherF
-
Surgeon wipes his 'ands a verseI
Chort e softly as he pitchesI
Probes and sponges to the nurseI
Thinks the lunch might have bin worseI
Close your little gap he hitchesI
Whistlin' as he jabs the stitchesI
-
I'm caught in with fiddle stringsI
Stuck about with bits 'n' patchesI
Fixed with ligatures 'n' springsI
Lath 'n' plastered swung in slingsI
Skewered with little wooden matchesI
Hung with hinges knobs 'n' latchesI
-
Till I lay behind me screenK
Serious 'n' sober one dayL
Satisfied 'n' all sereneK
'Arf a man 'n' 'arf machineK
What they winds up ev'ry MondayM
'N' it tilts all ways by SundayL
-
'Ome again I'll come a neatC
Semi autymatic loaferF
Number up 'n' all completeC
Creakin' round on Collins StreetC
With a licence which I'll owe forN
My own car and my own shoferN

Edward George Dyson



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