The Suicide Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis
Rhyme Scheme: AABBCDEEFFGGHH IJ KKLLMMNNBBOOGGPPMMQQ RRSSTTUU UUJI VVGGHHIJAAHHWWHBUUXY HHUUZZ A2A2UU UUMMB2B2HHMMUUUUUUGG HHC2C2 BBUUUUUUUUCCHHHHD2D2 UUHHE2E2UF2UBBG2G2C2 C2UUMMUUCurse thee Life I will live with thee no more | A |
Thou hast mocked me starved me beat my body sore | A |
And all for a pledge that was not pledged by me | B |
I have kissed thy crust and eaten sparingly | B |
That I might eat again and met thy sneers | C |
With deprecations and thy blows with tears | D |
Aye from thy glutted lash glad crawled away | E |
As if spent passion were a holiday | E |
And now I go Nor threat nor easy vow | F |
Of tardy kindness can avail thee now | F |
With me whence fear and faith alike are flown | G |
Lonely I came and I depart alone | G |
And know not where nor unto whom I go | H |
But that thou canst not follow me I know | H |
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Thus I to Life and ceased but through my brain | I |
My thought ran still until I spake again | J |
- | |
Ah but I go not as I came no trace | K |
Is mine to bear away of that old grace | K |
I brought I have been heated in thy fires | L |
Bent by thy hands fashioned to thy desires | L |
Thy mark is on me I am not the same | M |
Nor ever more shall be as when I came | M |
Ashes am I of all that once I seemed | N |
In me all's sunk that leapt and all that dreamed | N |
Is wakeful for alarm oh shame to thee | B |
For the ill change that thou hast wrought in me | B |
Who laugh no more nor lift my throat to sing | O |
Ah Life I would have been a pleasant thing | O |
To have about the house when I was grown | G |
If thou hadst left my little joys alone | G |
I asked of thee no favor save this one | P |
That thou wouldst leave me playing in the sun | P |
And this thou didst deny calling my name | M |
Insistently until I rose and came | M |
I saw the sun no more It were not well | Q |
So long on these unpleasant thoughts to dwell | Q |
Need I arise to morrow and renew | R |
Again my hated tasks but I am through | R |
With all things save my thoughts and this one night | S |
So that in truth I seem already quite | S |
Free and remote from thee I feel no haste | T |
And no reluctance to depart I taste | T |
Merely with thoughtful mien an unknown draught | U |
That in a little while I shall have quaffed | U |
- | |
Thus I to Life and ceased and slightly smiled | U |
Looking at nothing and my thin dreams filed | U |
Before me one by one till once again | J |
I set new words unto an old refrain | I |
- | |
Treasures thou hast that never have been mine | V |
Warm lights in many a secret chamber shine | V |
Of thy gaunt house and gusts of song have blown | G |
Like blossoms out to me that sat alone | G |
And I have waited well for thee to show | H |
If any share were mine and now I go | H |
Nothing I leave and if I naught attain | I |
I shall but come into mine own again | J |
Thus I to Life and ceased and spake no more | A |
But turning straightway sought a certain door | A |
In the rear wall Heavy it was and low | H |
And dark a way by which none e'er would go | H |
That other exit had and never knock | W |
Was heard thereat bearing a curious lock | W |
Some chance had shown me fashioned faultily | H |
Whereof Life held content the useless key | B |
And great coarse hinges thick and rough with rust | U |
Whose sudden voice across a silence must | U |
I knew be harsh and horrible to hear | X |
A strange door ugly like a dwarf So near | Y |
I came I felt upon my feet the chill | H |
Of acid wind creeping across the sill | H |
So stood longtime till over me at last | U |
Came weariness and all things other passed | U |
To make it room the still night drifted deep | Z |
Like snow about me and I longed for sleep | Z |
- | |
But suddenly marking the morning hour | A2 |
Bayed the deep throated bell within the tower | A2 |
Startled I raised my head and with a shout | U |
Laid hold upon the latch and was without | U |
- | |
- | |
- | |
Ah long forgotten well remembered road | U |
Leading me back unto my old abode | U |
My father's house There in the night I came | M |
And found them feasting and all things the same | M |
As they had been before A splendour hung | B2 |
Upon the walls and such sweet songs were sung | B2 |
As echoing out of very long ago | H |
Had called me from the house of Life I know | H |
So fair their raiment shone I looked in shame | M |
On the unlovely garb in which I came | M |
Then straightway at my hesitancy mocked | U |
It is my father's house I said and knocked | U |
And the door opened To the shining crowd | U |
Tattered and dark I entered like a cloud | U |
Seeing no face but his to him I crept | U |
And Father I cried and clasped his knees and wept | U |
Ah days of joy that followed All alone | G |
I wandered through the house My own my own | G |
My own to touch my own to taste and smell | H |
All I had lacked so long and loved so well | H |
None shook me out of sleep nor hushed my song | C2 |
Nor called me in from the sunlight all day long | C2 |
- | |
I know not when the wonder came to me | B |
Of what my father's business might be | B |
And whither fared and on what errands bent | U |
The tall and gracious messengers he sent | U |
Yet one day with no song from dawn till night | U |
Wondering I sat and watched them out of sight | U |
And the next day I called and on the third | U |
Asked them if I might go but no one heard | U |
Then sick with longing I arose at last | U |
And went unto my father in that vast | U |
Chamber wherein he for so many years | C |
Has sat surrounded by his charts and spheres | C |
Father I said Father I cannot play | H |
The harp that thou didst give me and all day | H |
I sit in idleness while to and fro | H |
About me thy serene grave servants go | H |
And I am weary of my lonely ease | D2 |
Better a perilous journey overseas | D2 |
Away from thee than this the life I lead | U |
To sit all day in the sunshine like a weed | U |
That grows to naught I love thee more than they | H |
Who serve thee most yet serve thee in no way | H |
Father I beg of thee a little task | E2 |
To dignify my days 'tis all I ask | E2 |
Forever but forever this denied | U |
I perish | F2 |
Child my father's voice replied | U |
All things thy fancy hath desired of me | B |
Thou hast received I have prepared for thee | B |
Within my house a spacious chamber where | G2 |
Are delicate things to handle and to wear | G2 |
And all these things are thine Dost thou love song | C2 |
My minstrels shall attend thee all day long | C2 |
Or sigh for flowers My fairest gardens stand | U |
Open as fields to thee on every hand | U |
And all thy days this word shall hold the same | M |
No pleasure shalt thou lack that thou shalt name | M |
But as for tasks he smiled and shook his head | U |
Thou hadst thy task and laidst it by he said | U |
Edna St. Vincent Millay
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