Investigating Flora Poem Rhyme Scheme

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'Twas in scientific circles	A
That the great Professor Brown	B
Had a world wide reputation	C
As a writer of renown	B
He had striven finer feelings	D
In our natures to implant	E
By his Treatise on the Morals	A
Of the Red eyed Bulldog Ant	E
He had hoisted an opponent	F
Who had trodden unawares	G
On his Reasons for Bare Patches	H
On the Female Native Bears	G
So they gave him an appointment	F
As instructor to a band	I
Of the most attractive females	J
To be gathered in the land	I
	-
'Twas a Ladies' Science Circle	K
Just the latest social fad	L
For the Nicest People only	M
And to make their rivals mad	L
They were fond of science rambles	J
To the country from the town	B
A parade of female beauty	M
In the leadership of Brown	B
They would pick a place for luncheon	C
And catch beetles on their rugs	J
The Professor called 'em optera	N
They call'd 'em nasty bugs	J
Well the thing was bound to perish	O
For no lovely woman can	P
Feel the slightest interest	Q
In a club without a Man	P
The Professor hardly counted	R
He was crazy as a loon	S
With a countenance suggestive	T
Of an elderly baboon	S
But the breath of Fate blew on it	U
With a sharp and sudden blast	V
And the Ladies' Science Circle	K
Is a memory of the past	V
	-
There were two and twenty members	J
Mostly young and mostly fair	N
Who had made a great excursion	C
To a place called Dontknowwhere	N
At the crossing of Lost River	N
On the road to No Man's Land	I
There they met an old selector	N
With a stockwhip in his hand	I
And the sight of so much beauty	M
Sent him slightly off his nut	W
So he asked them smiling blandly	M
Would they come down to the hut	W
I am come said the Professor	N
In his thin and reedy voice	J
To investigate your flora	N
Which I feel is very choice	J
The selector stared dumbfounded	X
Till at last he found his tongue	Y
To investigate my Flora	N
Oh you howlin' Brigham Young	Y
Why you've two and twenty wimmen	C
Reg'lar slap up wimmen too	Z
And you're after little Flora	N
And a crawlin' thing like you	Z
Oh you Mormonite gorilla	N
Well I've heard it from the first	A2
That you wizened little fellers	J
Is a hundred times the worst	A2
	-
But a dried up ape like you are	N
To be marchin' through the land	I
With a pack of lovely wimmen	C
Well I cannot understand	I
You mistake said the Professor	N
In a most indignant tone	C
While the ladies shrieked and jabbered	I
In a fashion of their own	C
You mistake about these ladies	J
I'm a lecturer of theirs	J
I am Brown who wrote the Treatise	J
On the Female Native Bears	J
When I said we wanted flora	N
What I meant was native flowers	J
Well you said you wanted Flora	N
And I'll swear you don't get ours	J
But here's Flora's self a comin'	C
And it's time for you to skip	B2
Or I'll write a treatise on you	Z
And I'll write it with the whip	B2
	-
Now I want no explanations	J
Just you hook it out of sight	I
Or you'll charm the poor girl some'ow	C2
The Professor looked in fright	I
She was six feet high and freckled	I
And her hair was turkey red	I
The Professor gave a whimper	N
And threw down his bag and fled	I
And the Ladies' Science Circle	K
With a simultaneous rush	D2
Travelled after its Professor	N
And went screaming through the bush	E2
	-
At the crossing of Lost River	N
On the road to No Man's Land	I
Where the grim and ghostly gumtrees	J
Block the view on every hand	I
There they weep and wail and wander	N
Always seeking for the track	F2
For the hapless old Professor	N
Hasn't sense to guide 'em back	F2
And they clutch at one another	N
And they yell and scream in fright	I
As they see the gruesome creatures	J
Of the grim Australian night	I
And they hear the mopoke's hooting	F2
And the dingo's howl so dread	I
And the flying foxes jabber	N
From the gum trees overhead	I
While the weird and wary wombats	J
In their subterranean caves	J
Are a digging always digging	F2
At those wretched people's graves	J
And the pike horned Queensland bullock	F2
From his shelter in the scrub	G2
Has his eye on the proceedings	J
Of the Ladies' Science Club	G2

Banjo Paterson (andrew Barton)

Investigating Flora Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis

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