Latest Accounts From Olympus Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis

Rhyme Scheme: AABBCC DEFFGD BBHHIIJJ BBKKLLBB MNOOPPQDDROSSTB JNJJUUUNNNNN UU

As news from Olympus has grown rather rareA
Since bards in their cruises have ceased to touch thereA
We extract for our readers the intelligence givenB
In our latest accounts from that ci devant HeavenB
That realm of the By gones where still sit in stateC
Old god heads and nod heads now long out of dateC
-
Jove himself it appears since his love days are o'erD
Seems to find immortality rather a boreE
Tho' he still asks for news of earth's capers and crimesF
And reads daily his old fellow Thunderer the TimesF
He and Vulcan it seems by their wives still hen peckt areG
And kept on a stinted allowance of nectarD
-
Old Phoebus poor lad has given up inspirationB
And packt off to earth on a puff speculationB
The fact is he found his old shrines had grown dimH
Since bards lookt to Bentley and Colburn not himH
So he sold off his stud of ambrosia fed nagsI
Came incog down to earth and now writes for the MagsI
Taking care that his work not a gleam hath to linger in'tJ
From which men could guess that the god had a finger in'tJ
-
There are other small facts well deserving attentionB
Of which our Olympic despatches make mentionB
Poor Bacchus is still very ill they allegeK
Having never recovered the Temperance PledgeK
What the Irish he cried those I lookt to the mostL
If they give up the spirit I give up the ghostL
While Momus who used of the gods to make funB
Is turned Socialist now and declares there are noneB
-
But these changes tho' curious are all a mere farceM
Compared to the new casus belli of MarsN
Who for years has been suffering the horrors of quietO
Uncheered by one glimmer of bloodshed or riotO
In vain from the clouds his belligerent browP
Did he pop forth in hopes that somewhere or somehowP
Like Pat at a fair he might coax up a rowQ
But the joke wouldn't take the whole world had got wiserD
Men liked not to take a Great Gun for adviserD
And still less to march in fine clothes to be shotR
Without very well knowing for whom or for whatO
The French who of slaughter had had their full swingS
Were content with a shot now and then at their KingS
While in England good fighting's a pastime so hard to gainT
Nobody's left to fight with but Lord CardiganB
-
'Tis needless to say then how monstrously happyJ
Old Mars has been made by what's now on the tapisN
How much it delights him to see the French rallyJ
In Liberty's name around Mehemet AliJ
Well knowing that Satan himself could not findU
A confection of mischief much more to his mindU
Than the old Bonnet Rouge and the Bashaw combinedU
Right well too he knows that there ne'er were attackersN
Whatever their cause that they didn't find backersN
While any slight care for Humanity's woesN
May be soothed by that Art Diplomatique which showsN
How to come in the most approved method to blowsN
-
This is all for to day whether Mars is much vextU
At his friend Thiers's exit we'll know by our nextU

Thomas Moore



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