The Lament Of Toby, The Learned Pig Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis

Rhyme Scheme: ABCB DEFE GEHE IJEJ KLDL MNON PBQB RESE TUNU VNNN DEWE MUXU VUEU EFEF BSB EYZA2 B2BC2B SEBE ED2ED2

Oh heavy day oh day of woeA
To misery a posterB
Why was I ever farrowed whyC
Not spitted for a roasterB
-
In this world pigs as well as menD
Must dance to fortune's fiddlingsE
But must I give the classics upF
For barley meal and middlingsE
-
Of what avail that I could spellG
And read just like my bettersE
If I must come to this at lastH
To litters not to lettersE
-
Oh why are pigs made scholars ofI
It baffles my discerningJ
What griskins fry and chitterlingsE
Can have to do with learningJ
-
Alas my learning once drew cashK
But public fame's unstableL
So I must turn a pig againD
And fatten for the tableL
-
To leave my literary lineM
My eyes get red and leakyN
But Giblett doesn't want me blueO
But red and white and streakyN
-
Old Mullins used to cultivateP
My learning like a gard'nerB
But Giblett only thinks of lardQ
And not of Doctor LardnerB
-
He does not care about my brainR
The value of two coppersE
All that he thinks about my headS
Is how I'm off for choppersE
-
Of all my literary kinT
A farewell must be takenU
Goodbye to the poetic HoggN
The philosophic BaconU
-
Day after day my lessons fadeV
My intellect gets muddyN
A trough I have and not a deskN
A stye and not a studyN
-
Another little month and thenD
My progress ends like Bunyan'sE
The seven sages that I lovedW
Will be chopped up with onionsE
-
Then over head and ears in brineM
They'll souse me like a salmonU
My mathematics turned to brawnX
My logic into gammonU
-
My Hebrew will all retrogradeV
Now I'm put up to fattenU
My Greek it will all go to greaseE
The dogs will have my LatinU
-
Farewell to Oxford and to BlissE
To Milman Crowe and GlossopF
I now must be content with chatsE
Instead of learned gossipF
-
Farewell to 'Town ' farewell to 'Gown '-
I've quite outgrown the latterB
Instead of Trencher cap my headS
Will soon be in a platterB
-
Oh why did I at Brazen NoseE
Rout up the roots of knowledgeY
A butcher that can't read will killZ
A pig that's been to collegeA2
-
For sorrow I could stick myselfB2
But conscience is a dasherB
A thing that would be rash in manC2
In me would be a rasherB
-
One thing I ask when I am deadS
And past the Stygian ditchesE
And that is let my schoolmasterB
Have one of my two HitchesE
-
'Twas he who taught my letters soE
I ne'er mistook or missed 'emD2
Simply by ringing at the noseE
According to Bell's systemD2

Thomas Hood



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