Etching Moralised. To A Noble Lady. Poem Rhyme Scheme

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Thomas Hood

Etching Moralised. To A Noble Lady. Poem Rhyme Scheme and Analysis

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To point a moral JOHNSON	A
	-
	-
Fairest Lady and Noble for once on a time	B
Condescend to accept in the humblest of rhyme	B
And a style more of Gay than of Milton	A
A few opportune verses design'd to impart	C
Some didactical hints in a Needlework Art	C
Not described by the Countess of Wilton	A
	-
An Art not unknown to the delicate hand	D
Of the fairest and first in this insular land	D
But in Patronage Royal delighting	E
And which now your own feminine fantasy wins	F
Tho' it scarce seems a lady like work that begins	F
In a scratching and ends in a biting	E
	-
Yet oh that the dames of the Scandalous School	G
Would but use the same acid and sharp pointed tool	G
That are plied in the said operations	H
Oh would that our Candours on copper would sketch	I
For the first of all things in begining to etch	I
Are good grounds for our representations	H
	-
Those protective and delicate coatings of wax	J
Which are meant to resist the corrosive attacks	J
That would ruin the copper completely	K
Thin cerements which whoso remembers the Bee	K
So applauded by Watts the divine LL D	K
Will be careful to spread very neatly	K
	-
For why like some intricate deed of the law	L
Should the ground in the process be left with a flaw	L
Aqua fortis is far from a joker	M
And attacking the part that no coating protects	N
Will turn out as distressing to all your effects	N
As a landlord who puts in a broker	M
	-
Then carefully spread the conservative stuff	O
Until all the bright metal is cover'd enough	O
To repel a destructive so active	P
For in Etching as well as in Morals pray note	Q
That a little raw spot or a hole in a coat	Q
Your ascetics find vastly attractive	P
	-
Thus the ground being laid very even and flat	R
And then smoked with a taper till black as a hat	R
Still from future disasters to screen it	S
Just allow me by way of precaution to state	T
You must hinder the footman from changing your plate	T
Nor yet suffer the butler to clean it	S
	-
Nay the housemaid perchance in her passion to scrub	U
May suppose the dull metal in want of a rub	U
Like the Shield which Swift's readers remember	M
Not to mention the chance of some other mishaps	V
Such as having your copper made up into caps	V
To be worn on the First of September	M
	-
But aloof from all damage by Betty or John	W
You secure the veil'd surface and trace thereupon	W
The design you conceive the most proper	M
Yet gently and not with a needle too keen	X
Lest it pierce to the wax through the paper between	X
And of course play Old Scratch with the copper	M
	-
So in worldly affairs the sharp practising man	Y
Is not always the one who succeeds in his plan	Y
Witness Shylock's judicial exposure	M
Who as keen as his knife yet with agony found	Z
That while urging his point he was losing his ground	Z
And incurring a fatal disclosure	M
	-
But perhaps without tracing at all you may choose	A2
To indulge in some little extempore views	A2
Like the older artistical people	B2
For example a Corydon playing his pipe	C2
In a Low Country marsh with a Cow after Cuyp	C2
And a Goat skipping over a steeple	B2
	-
A wild Deer at a rivulet taking a sup	C2
With a couple of Pillars put in to fill up	C2
Like the columns of certain diurnals	A2
Or a very brisk sea in a very stiff gale	D2
And a very Dutch boat with a very big sail	D2
Or a bevy of Retzsch Infernals	A2
	-
Architectural study or rich Arabesque	E
Allegorical dream or a view picturesque	E
Near to Naples or Venice or Florence	A2
Or as harmless as lambs and as gentle as doves	A2
A sweet family cluster of plump little Loves	A2
Like the Children by Reynolds or Lawrence	A2
	-
But whatever the subject your exquisite taste	E2
Will ensure a design very charming and chaste	E2
Like yourself full of nature and beauty	K
Yet besides the good points you already reveal	F2
You will need a few others of well temper'd steel	F2
And especially form'd for the duty	K
	-
For suppose that the tool be imperfectly set	G2
Over many weak lengths in your line you will fret	G2
Like a pupil of Walton and Cotton	A
Who remains by the brink of the water agape	C2
While the jack trout or barbel effects its escape	C2
Thro' the gut or silk line being rotten	A
	-
Therefore let the steel point be set truly and round	Z
That the finest of strokes may be even and sound	Z
Flowing glibly where fancy would lead 'em	H2
But alas for the needle that fetters the hand	D
And forbids even sketches of Liberty's land	D
To be drawn with the requisite freedom	H2
	-
Oh the botches I've seen by a tool of the sort	I2
Rather hitching than etching and making in short	I2
Such stiff crabbed and angular scratches	A2
That the figures seem'd statues or mummies from tombs	A2
While the trees were as rigid as bundles of brooms	A2
And the herbage like bunches of matches	A2
	-
The stiff clouds as if carefully iron'd and starch'd	J2
While a cast iron bridge meant for wooden o'er arch'd	J2
Something more like a road than a river	M
Prythee who in such characteristics could see	K
Any trace of the beautiful land of the free	K
The Free Mason Free Trader Free Liver	M
	-
But prepared by a hand that is skilful and nice	A2
The fine point glides along like a skate on the ice	A2
At the will of the Gentle Designer	M
Who impelling the needle just presses so much	K2
That each line of her labor the copper may touch	K2
As if done by a penny a liner	M
	-
And behold how the fast growing images gleam	L2
Like the sparkles of gold in a sunshiny stream	L2
Till perplex'd by the glittering issue	A2
You repine for a light of a tenderer kind	M2
And in choosing a substance for making a blind	M2
Do not sneeze at the paper call'd tissue	A2
	-
For subdued by the sheet so transparent and white	N2
Your design will appear in a soberer light	N2
And reveal its defects on inspection	A
Just as Glory achieved or political scheme	L2
And some more of our dazzling performances seem	L2
Not so bright on a cooler reflection	A
	-
So the juvenile Poet with ecstasy views	A2
His first verses and dreams that the songs of his Muse	A2
Are as brilliant as Moore's and as tender	M
Till some critical sheet scans the faulty design	O2
And alas takes the shine out of every line	O2
That had form'd such a vision of splendor	M
	-
Certain objects however may come in your sketch	I
Which design'd by a hand unaccustom'd to etch	I
With a luckless result may be branded	P2
Wherefore add this particular rule to your code	Q2
Let all vehicles take the wrong side of the road	Q2
And man woman and child be left handed	R2
	-
Yet regard not the awkward appearance with doubt	S2
But remember how often mere blessings fall out	S2
That at first seem'd no better than curses	A2
So till things take a turn live in hope and depend	T2
That whatever is wrong will come right in the end	T2
And console you for all your reverses	A2
	-
But of errors why speak when for beauty and truth	U2
Your free spirited Etching is worthy in sooth	U2
Of that Club may all honor betide it	S
Which tho' dealing in copper by genius and taste	E2
Has accomplish'd a service of plate not disgraced	E2
By the work of a Goldsmith beside it	S
	-
So your sketch superficially drawn on the plate	T
It becomes you to fix in a permanent state	T
Which involves a precise operation	A
With a keen biting fluid which eating its way	V2
As in other professions is common they say	V2
Has attain'd an artistical station	A
	-
And it's oh that some splenetic folks I could name	W2
If they must deal in acids would use but the same	W2
In such innocent graphical labors	A2
In the place of the virulent spirit wherewith	U2
Like the polecat the weasel and things of that kith	U2
They keep biting the backs of their neighbors	A2
	-
But beforehand with wax or the shoemaker's pitch	X2
You must build a neat dyke round the margin in which	X2
You may pour the dilute aqua fortis	A2
For if raw like a dram it will shock you to trace	A2
Your design with a horrible froth on its face	A2
Like a wretch in articulo mortis	A2
	-
Like a wretch in the pangs that too many endure	Y2
From the use of strong waters without any pure	Y2
A vile practice most sad and improper	M
For from painful examples this warning is found	Z
That the raw burning spirit will take up the ground	Z
In the churchyard as well as on copper	M
	-
But the Acid has duly been lower'd and bites	A2
Only just where the visible metal invites	A2
Like a nature inclined to meet troubles	A2
And behold as each slender and glittering line	O2
Effervesces you trace the completed design	O2
In an elegant bead work of bubbles	A2
	-
And yet constantly secretly eating its way	V2
The shrewd acid is making the substance its prey	V2
Like some sorrow beyond inquisition	A
Which is gnawing the heart and the brain all the while	Z2
That the face is illumed by its cheerfullest smile	Z2
And the wit is in bright ebullition	A
	-
But still stealthily feeding the treacherous stuff	O
Has corroded and deepen'd some portions enough	O
The pure sky and the waters so placid	R2
And these tenderer tints to defend from attack	E
With some turpentine varnish and sooty lamp black	E
You must stop out the ferreting acid	R2
	-
But before with the varnishing brush you proceed	A3
Let the plate with cold water be thoroughly freed	A3
From the other less innocent liquor	M
After which on whatever you want to protect	B3
Put a coat that will act to that very effect	B3
Like the black one which hangs on the Vicar	M
	-
Then the varnish well dried urge the biting again	A
But how long at its meal the eau forte may remain	A
Time and practice alone can determine	A
But of course not so long that the Mountain and Mill	C3
The rude Bridge and the Figures whatever you will	C3
Are as black as the spots on your ermine	A
	-
It is true none the less that a dark looking scrap	C2
With a sort of Blackheath and Black Forest mayhap	C2
Is consider'd as rather Rembrandty	B3
And that very black cattle and very black sheep	C2
A black dog and a shepherd as black as a sweep	C2
Are the pets of some great Dilettante	B3
	-
So with certain designers one needs not to name	W2
All this life is a dark scene of sorrow and shame	W2
From our birth to our final adjourning	E
Yea this excellent earth and its glories alack	E
What with ravens palls cottons and devils as black	E
As a Warehouse for Family Mourning	E
	-
But before your own picture arrives at that pitch	X2
While the lights are still light and the shadows though rich	X2
More transparent than ebony shutters	A2
Never minding what Black Arted critics may say	V2
Stop the biting and pour the green fluid away	V2
As you please into bottles or gutters	A2
	-
Then removing the ground and the wax at a heat	B3
Cleanse the surface with oil spermaceti or sweet	B3
For your hand a performance scarce proper	M
So some careful professional person secure	Y2
For the Laundress will not be a safe amateur	M
To assist you in cleaning the copper	M
	-
And in truth 'tis a rather unpleasantish job	D3
To be done on a hot German stove or a hob	D3
Though as sure of an instant forgetting	E
When as after the dark clearing off of a storm	E3
The fair Landscape shines out in a lustre as warm	E3
As the glow of the sun in its setting	E
	-
Thus your Etching complete it remains but to hint	B3
That with certain assistance from paper and print	B3
Which the proper Mechanic will settle	B2
You may charm all your Friends without any sad tale	D2
Of such perils and ills as beset Lady Sale	D2
With a fine India Proof of your Metal	B2