- 1. Oh Scissors!
I knew a young man so conceited
That a glance at his face made you heated.
One night, playing whist,
He was slapped on the wrist,
...
- 2. The Sissy Boy
Beware the Sissy Boy my child,
Not because he's very wild;
The Sissy Boy is never that,
Although he'll run if you say "Scat!"
...
- 3. April Fool
'Twas on the f-f-f-first of April D-D-Day,
W-w-w-when Nature s-s-smiled and all w-w-was gay,
And I--w-w-why I was in a w-w-whirl,
'C-c-cause I w-w-was w-w-walking w-w-with my g-g-girl.
...
- 4. Why The Mole Is Blind
In days gone by, when cows could fly
And goblins rode on bears;
When fairies danced upon the green
And giants moped in lairs,
...
- 5. The War Of The Rats And Mice
Far back within an age remote,
Which common history fails to note,
When dogs could talk, and pigs could sing,
And frogs obeyed a wooden king,
...
- 6. In Deeper Vein
The Incubus.
The way was dark within the gloomy church-yard,
...
- 7. The Processional
(Written in collaboration with R. B. Hamilton.)
When Julius Caesar met his death,
...
by Edwin C. Ranck