I poured spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.
Quote by Steven Wright
Click on the picture of Steven Wright quote you want to see a larger version.
I poured spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.
Click on the picture of Steven Wright quote you want to see a larger version.
Steven Wright Quotes
- I play the harmonica. The only way I can play is if I get my car going really fast, and stick it out the window.
- I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.
- I went to the bank and asked to borrow a cup of money. They said, 'What for?' I said, 'I'm going to buy some sugar.'
- A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.
- What's another word for Thesaurus?
- I have an answering machine in my car. It says, I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out.
- I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving.
- When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction.
- Babies don't need a vacation, but I still see them at the beach... it pisses me off! I'll go over to a little baby and say 'What are you doing here? You haven't worked a day in your life!'
- Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country.
Best Quotes
- The advertisements in a newspaper are more full knowledge in respect to what is going on in a state or community than the editorial columns are.
- I was elected to come to an incredibly dysfunctional capital and make the government work better, and that's what I'm doing.
- In a democracy the poor will have more power than the rich, because there are more of them, and the will of the majority is supreme.
- One thing you can say about nuclear power: the people who believe it is the silver bullet for America's energy problems never give up.
- But now, more and more, its society is concerned with economy and finance.
- I learned the value of hard work by working hard.
- People hurt you again if you can't give them any more.
- By the time the children go to bed, I am as drained as any mother who has spent her day working, car pooling, building Lego castles and shopping for the precisely correct soccer cleat.
- It's not easy to define poetry.
- We were making the first step out of the age of chemistry and physics, and into the age of biology.