Mulhopwana Behind Curtains | Symon Maguru

To the peak of my melody
In Matowi tree, I whistle
Calming my bitterness with sweetness
Twisted in my thoughts
About to breakdown;
Yet the voice of my ancestors
Rebuke me, as they consider me a desert.

Hidden in a fog of Valour
Labelled before my existence
They expect me to bleed
With a grinning face;
Could this be Valour or Vanity?
Wishing all folks envision,
Colour of my eyes in the closed eyelids.

Above this Armor of honor
My body is fully bruised
However a brave warrior you see
Knowing none about a water fall of tears
Falling inside my intestines
A Hill of Toxins decaying in me,
Fighting a battle beyond your detection ability.

Raised in this location,
Carrying our flag was labeled on me,
To preserve and make it blossom
Like a watered flower;
Is defined as Manning up
Hence commemoration of our day,
Isn’t keenly regarded, so is this equality?

Laying on Lake of Impartiality
Ungrateful I could be
To put all blame and red marks
Without consideration of Salts
You spilled on my plate,
Full of food that stimulated my growth
Finally I’m a little Giant among elders.

Now hear My Proposal, My wish
Hopes and aspirations,
Will fluctuate more and more
All because re-branding is all I seek.
As centuries turn!
Co-existence of a new lifeline
Must evolve.

“ Mwene wa ma Mwene”
Is my dream title in this Village
Though my wishes conflict with our norms,
On the Gorge of unwavering hardships
It matters not how weak I be
For I walk on its edges without dragging
Just behind these curtains, I hide my grief.

Poet's note: From childhood many males were groomed in a hard way that men don't cry and I was raised in that way too. Growing up I realised that emotions are not a sign of weakness but it only shows that you were trying to be strong for too long, things fallen apart and you can't help it but grieve. The title of the poem contains an African word "Mulhopwana" which is a Lhomwe term that stands for "boy/male" and the word "mwene wa ma mwene" stands for "King of Kings". Inside the poem you will see experience of a young man in an African society who has openly revealed what happens in his unguarded moments when life knocks him down showing to his society that men are not robots their voice matters, tears are part of us just as happiness was meant to be.