Am Sorry

Why do I feel like a useless fool
I end up hurting and being cruel
Barely holding on to my sanity
Struggling to stay with you and me
I’m not what I was and can never find
The thing inside that once was my mind
A silent enemy that is emptiness
A lack of loving so hard to redress
I cannot see an end to the pain
I’ve tried to tell you again and again
It’s lonely and empty inside my head
A working mind that now is dead

I stay to try to be the best I can
I cannot rest in finding the man
He’s gone away a while ago
I’m sorry more than you’ll ever know
I’ve lost our past, our history
Changing the us into you and me
I’m turning your love into hate
You’ll find it easier to placate
Hurting the ones I love the most
Looking for someone who’s now a ghost
I just don’t know where this will end
Unable to heal what cannot mend