I can never tell when something is funny. I just have to do it onstage and find out.

• I didn't appreciate the young woman that I was, or my young beauty, because I was so obsessed with the fact that I felt fat. It's never good to add to anybody else's suffering. It's an important topic to really get the gravity and the importance of - dealing with dignity.
• Thankfully, beauty is easier to remove than apply, and a swipe of demaquillage in the right direction and you are you once again.
• Just because you are blind and unable to see my beauty doesn't mean it does not exist.
• People drain me, even the closest of friends, and I find loneliness to be the best state in the union to live in.
• Interventions are really emotionally exhausting and I would never ever want to have one. In the same way, I would never want to have a surprise birthday party. That would be horrible.
• It is tragic that people who are incarcerated are unable to vote. They are probably the most important voices to listen to because they can tell us what we need to change.
• Sometimes when we are generous in small, barely detectable ways it can change someone else's life forever.
• I'm taking a lot of my favorite artists, different people, my favorite music and marrying that with what I do as a comic. It's very collaborative, arty, fun and cool.
• I can never tell when something is funny. I just have to do it onstage and find out.
• My parents are very funny when they have to deal with anything racy or off-color. They usually pretend they don't speak English.