I saw a bank that said '24 Hour Banking,' but I don't have that much time.
Quote by Steven Wright
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Steven Wright Quotes
Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.
I was a peripheral visionary. I could see the future, but only way off to the side.
I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.
Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country.
For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.
There was a power outage at a department store yesterday. Twenty people were trapped on the escalators.
I have an answering machine in my car. It says, I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out.
I think God's going to come down and pull civilization over for speeding.
I intend to live forever. So far, so good.
I went to the bank and asked to borrow a cup of money. They said, 'What for?' I said, 'I'm going to buy some sugar.'
It's amazing how people will give when you don't ask. Many of them send money because they believe in the message.
I think Gingrich has embarrassed the party over time. Whether he'll do it again in the future, I don't know. But Gov. Romney never has.
My work has also motivated me to put a lot of time into seeking out good food and to spend more money on it.
When women earn the money for the family, everyone in the family benefits. We also know that when women have an income, everyone wins because women dedicate 90% of the income to health, education, to food security, to the children, to the family, or to the community, so when women have an income, everybody wins.
War is like love it always finds a way.
As men are not able to fight against death, misery, ignorance, they have taken it into their heads, in order to be happy, not to think of them at all.
The '80s made up for all the abuse I took during the '70s. I outlived all my critics. By the time I retired, everybody saw me as a venerable institution. Things do change.
Happy is he who still loves something he loved in the nursery He has not been broken in two by time he is not two men, but one, and he has saved not only his soul, but his life.
Let us learn to appreciate there will be times when the trees will be bare, and look forward to the time when we may pick the fruit.
Death and love are the two wings that bear the good man to heaven.