All Quotations / Quotations from George Burns
First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
I get a standing ovation jaust standing.
I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.
I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.
No snowflake in an avalanche ever feels responsible.
Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.
Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years.
The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning anf a good ending; and have the two as close together as possible.
Too bad all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxi cabs and cutting hair.
Too bad the only people who know how to run the country are busy driving cabs and cutting hair.