Please Forgive Me

If I would accidentally knock on your door,
Would your eyes recognize me,
Would your lips remember the stories they used to share when we kiss,
Would your body remember the taste of my hands,
Would you hug Me and kiss me the same way you used to?
If I am to drunk to embark to my adobe,
Would your house have a room for my soul,
Would your kitchen have a meal for my flesh,
Would your bathroom welcome with warm waters to cool off the booze in my mind,
This break up had made me old,
Driving winds to remind my self of how you used to smile,
Begging my mind not to make you the focal point of my thinking,
But how can a mind so small forget the rose that grew from its eyelids,
When I close my eyes you are the one I see,
Am even afraid to love again cause I will end up seeing you in them,
You said I will forget about you
But what if time fails to do what it is suppose to do?
How do you expect me,to live without you,
I can only exist without you, but I can never live,
I could smell the breath of your love through every wind I touch with my heart,
Am even afraid of getting out,from this shackles of misery,
Am scared that I might come across you,and you would see me drunk in a break up,
And further confirm that I was just a useless boy friend who loved you deeply.

Truth be told,I miss you, I miss the feeling of loving you,
I miss the thought of you walking into the heart of my room,and suddenly my room smells like you,
I've made many mistakes in my life,
Some I regret about it and some I've spilled the water,
But this mistake of losing is one that digs my house of eternity,

I can't escape the feeling, think about you everyday,
I find my self writing paragraphs and deleting the meaning, am afraid that you will remind me of how badly I treated you, yet I die in every thought of how I mistreated you,
I wish I could ask for forgiveness but I know that it would be just an underistament,
I want you to know that I miss,
And I hate my self for the way I treated you,
I let stinking insecurities grew over my love,
But my financial situation was the reason that gave birth to this insecurities,
I wanted to do more for you,but money didn't have any approval, so I gave you my heart that also wasn't enough,
Forgive me for trying so much..
I only wrote to tell you that I love you and miss you.