Politeness, n. The most acceptable hypocrisy.

• Faith Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel.
• The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.
• Painting The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critic.
• The covers of this book are too far apart.
• Politics, n. Strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles.
• Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.
• Quotation, n The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
• Brain an apparatus with which we think we think.
• Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum
• Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.